Systems, Patterns and Understanding
It's not so much about finding the right philosophy, or approach, or discipline. They all vary and are not complete. As you live you run across their paths and use them, and they work to some degree, but not entirely. They can disappoint.
What's needed is patience with all of them. You almost have to see their shortcomings and realize they're bound to have them. You have to temper your disappointment with them with patience and acceptance. They are not forever or written in stone, they are just temporary helpers.