637.

Principles

Living

Sometimes its simple

I've lost some weight this past year and am somewhat thin but recenty I've done some excercize and gotten some air and sun  The thinness was given an overlay of resiliency and the lines filled out a bit.  I could tell from people's reactions my presentation was not unpleasant. All this leads me to say it does not answer one's problems but sometimes just looking a little better can lift your mood and feeling of well being.  It can be a starting point.  Sometimes it's that simple. There's a lot more to it, but sometimes this can help and do the job.

635.  Past

Observations

Loss in life
There is real loss in life. Life doesn't regenerate itself. You can be revived, but there still is loss in life.

635.

Principles

Understanding

How it works

At first you understand all sides of an issue, plus the subleties.  But to move on in life a direction has to be had so you refine one particular point of view. It is true for you at the time. You refine it and even debate with others over it, stengthening your resolve within it. While living it you seem to impress others with it, which confirms to you its correctness.  For a time it seems as if you are ahead of your time, on a new wave of understanding as such, and spreading the word.

However, whether it be the times we live in and or human nature itself, others also are strengthening themselves in their resolve and their paths, whether congruent with yours or different.  The right or wrong of their beliefs becomes less important than the assertion of them and themselves.  Every one has become like checker pieces, all taking up an equal measure of space with equal powers. What happens then is that every move you make is met by another move from someone else whose force is equal to yours.  It becomes 'tit for tat' in a sense. All ways from all people are asserted with none dominating. 

Correcting others doesn't work. Even helping others is misused.  Your giving is received until the person is strengthened to a point where they return your help with contention. It is not presonal. Rather the overall forces existing today push the person to their maximum expansion and selfhood.  The individual is enlarged to almost mythological proportions.  Within this environment thankfulness and humility are traits that give one a secondary status.

The only way out of this conundrum is to seek a viewpoint that seeks unification, a perspective that unites all views.  This can be seen 
as higher ground or as a universal viewpoint.  Maybe even as a peaceful perspective or an elevated one.  You try to embody this way of being.  For a time it seems to work.  Others seem to be impressed and even are lured to your 'light' and your posture of peace.

However, cracks appear. As the general level of civilization and subsequent behavior and discourse and amenities declines, small and larger aggravations and personal violations become more frequent. Random violations occur both with individuals and institutions and a certain standard of behavior is no longer a given.  Granted, redeeming actions are still present as their spirit cannot be squelched forever. They represent the healthy force towards equilbrium.  However, they happen despite declining social norms. This includes the family, friends, work, community or lack of, and business and social settings.

As such, a random insult or a lack of manners might trigger a sudden negative response from you.  Your newfound elevated consciousness is no match for sniper like attacks on your well being.  Stress, real health and financial concerns, erode your peace even as you seek to rejuvinate it.  So, a slight or verbal attack elicits from you a knee jerk reaction.  You are back in the frey so to speak.  Your animal one upsmanship and defense mechanism and fight or flight instincts come into play.  You are disappointed with this outcome. It is d let down.  This is not a good resolution for human as a whole or your own behavior.

So how should this be seen?  The answer at this time is that it is all part of experience and one has to just move through it to the other side.  You cannot embody one way of being, even a peaceful worthy way. At times you can represent harmony, at other times you can have a knee jerk reaction.  There is also a place for the latter.  It is not for you to orchestrate how it goes. If you are haggled you might respond in kind.  Othertimes you present wisdom.  All things are done and experienced by you. 

Once again a larger perspective if garnered from all this. Accepting this state of being brings about a temperance in one's attitude and nature. Temperance in all things becomes our only island of safety. Or another way of saying it is we have to put up with all of it gracefully if possible.

634.  Past

Lamentations

It’s all hard

Thinking of my mom upon arising and about her condition.  All seems hard.  The whole of life is hard.  The good, the bad, it’s all hard.  I want to be with God.

633.  Past

Religion

Mainstreaming religion

All religions at some point become mainstream.  The young people need to succeed in society, and use it to further themselves.  Success overrides the original message.

632.

Vignettes

Regular guy dinner   

My neighbor Ed took me out for dinner at a health food restaurant in Boca Raton, Florida.  He is here not often, staying in Albany with his younger 2nd wife. His first had died.  Ed was Jewish but being from Albany did not have many hard edges. Hence, he was easy to be around.  He was approaching a big birthday.  In Florida when he was gone I looked after his place. When his 88 year old father in law stayed down for a couple of months I kept an eye on him.

The restaurant was full, surprising on a Monday night.  Traffic had been heavy.  On the way I told him about my car, Irving's recent troubles and ongoing saga.  It was an interesting tale and still was not finished.  He listened and offered that his new car after 25,000 miles had no warranty and he just spent $450 on it. On the food front I ordered bison organic meat, something I rarely have.  I also had carrot cake for desert.  Before there was a salad and then a pizza like appetizer made from organic ingredients. 

The place was noisy and I had trouble hearing him.  I did  hear that he was arranging a vacation for his family for his big birthday.  During the meal I was bumped from behind often but I, normally observant, was oblivious.  Finally I looked behind me I saw a table filled with 8 women occupying part of the isles.  No wonder.  Ed said they were very rude in grabbing chairs.  The entire meal I was unaware of what happened but he was watching.  We both were critical of their behavior.

We talked about his wife's good friend's husband who just recovered from colon cancer.  It was a bit of a nightmare although when I saw his friend Bob he looked fine.  Ed told me he will be driving Bob's car back to New York because Bob can't sit that long. The year had been a hard one for Bob and his wife  They were down in Florida for a short while and I saw them briefly at Ed's place.

On the way home Ed stopped short at a yellow light.  I told him at 130 AM I once got a ticket for running a yellow light turning red.  He said did you fight it?  I said I looked into it but didn't.  He said if I disagreed I should have written a letter.  I said I have to priortize my battles.  We went back and forth.  He said one time he wrote a letter about a ticket and got satisfaction.  I considered what he said and said so.  I felt no pressure to finalize a conclusion.

There is no theme or major or even minor point to this writing. It is just tidbits from life with no central thrust.  However, there can be  a point to be drawn from all this.  That is once in awhile it is okay just to be a regular guy having a regular evening with another regular guy with no agenda attached or purpose .  It's okay just to be regular some times.

631.  Past
'
Observations

Slant 

There is the universe, which I exist in.  The universe has its truth, and I (not being   complete) have my slant on this truth.  Sometimes my take is close to the truth, sometimes it is not so close and sometimes it is hard to tell the difference.