584.

Principles

Living

From the sage alive about 2000 years ago.
Hillel 2  

'Do not separate yourself from the community.'


Wow.  I've wanted to be part of a community forever. However always seems as if the community is stifling.  Maybe that's just my background.  When you are thwarted in certain ways, you tend to need your own space to recalibrate yourself.  Then you are alone but subject to your own distortions.  That can be a trap.  Plus, when separated it's easy to become an enlarged ego because the normal system of checks and balances is not part of your existence.  So it is risky.   But so is joining any community.  One can wait for the right one, but that is not easy to find.  If one just joins a group to make the best of it, that can suck  one's energy.  The only true community at this point in time is that group which is affixed to the above in a humbling way, and people like this are scattered all around and hard to find.  Some might even be too damaged to contribute.  Perhaps one in an existential way has to accept all humanity as their community. However, until one can really live it, your day to day life is an isolated one.

583.

Principles

Nature

Surety 

Lightning popped
it's raw power
pure essence
drawing me
from confusion
to surety.

582.  Past

Observations

(sketch from years ago, biking with a neighbor)

581.  Past


582.

Principles

Wisdom

Talmud

Somewhere in the Talmud a sage wrote


“When all things are considered
the day you die is a better day
than the day you were born.”


For some reason this lifted my spirits.

581.

Vignette

Jon the bast...rd

I saw Jon at my high school reunion.  He was a little overweight but otherwise looked as if he was taken care of.  Coming into the high school in tenth grade all the groups and clicks were set up and Jon did not quite fit in.  He would blurt out what he thought and usually his timing  and cadence were off.  The powers that be in the class would let him know too. I wasn't part of a group but I had individual peers I related to on different levels.  To Jon's credit he was an observer as was I so we shared notes occasionally. 

Jon had a place in Florida near me now and he said we must get together.  I agreed  and six months  later I received a call and we made a date to meet at Panera's midway between us.  We met and our talk was surprisingly relaxing.  At the reunion, I didn't recall but I must have shared some more observations about our class with him.  He wanted to discuss some of them which we did.  When leaving I asked if we covered the class notes pretty well and he said I was pretty complete.  During lunch Jon asked me how I passed the years and I answered with a mix of truth and convenience.  He described his journalism career as starting of all places in Florida, then going to Texas and eventually to New York.  He said at some point he couldn't take it anymore and had sold enough apartments and inherited a pile of money from his dad, a prominent lawyer in New York. Jon said he grew up on Park Avenue and even though never asking for much money accept for a down payment on a house in Ft. Lauderdale, he always sensed this pot of gold was there for him.  Well, that explains his sometimes carelessness and lack of timing.  He could make mistakes some of us can't.

Jon was married three times times and I asked him 'why, was it his fault?' He said no, he was just unlucky.  He did seem kind of lucky though in his life and was able to role with the punches, helped of course by knowing there was back up.  He seemed to land on his feet quite often and also made the best of things.

Anyhow, all this leads to a scenario which sums up the impression I received that afternoon.  Jon had been working at a leading news station in Texas as a manager and got fired.  His boss was on the phone with an executive from ABC in New York and said he just fired his manager (Jon) and that he was a 'bast...rd.'  The New York ABC executive said “what's his name.  That's just what we need around here, a bast...rd'   Jon worked at ABC for 11 years.  And that's the impression I got of how Jon rolled.

580.  Past

Observations

Whatever has happened

More and more
what I have to say
is inadequate
based on right and wrong
principles that no longer apply.

And why bother
if people can't change
and behavior doesn't modify?

Whatever has happened
or has not
is too powerful
for words to penetrate.