u let down others regardless

Just living causes a deficit

10/16/2013

78. Past

(Note: While born Jewish I am not observant. However, from time to time I run into Judaism and this time the result was poignant.)

Theology

Just living causes a deficit

The Jewish holiday Yom Kippur deals with atonement and how one has sinned
before God. It made me think of the people I have inadvertently hurt, such
as my friend Ruth. Just by pursuing my own interests and survival needs I
wasn’t there for her or for others as I should have been. I couldn’t help
it or avoid this, but even so damage was done. So one needs to receive
some form of forgiveness for this. We know by being hurt ourselves how the
others feel.

There is a spiritual principle that says in this life we are ½ partners with
God. He does some of the work and we do some. This is one way to see
life. This implies forward motion, building towards a better world and
improvement.

Yom Kippur relates to another way of seeing life. This is that the very
act of living causes a deficit, for time, energy and wherewithal are finite and
because of this we are unable to give to others as much as they need. They
are hurt by this. Love (even tough love), patience, care and
acknowledgment should be there for them but we fall short of providing
it.   While you are helping one friend you cannot be helping
another. We need some time out to be saddened by this and for our need to
be forgiven and acknowledge our shortcomings. This could be done various
times throughout the year or on a special day such as Yom Kippur.

2 Comments

Tom

10/18/2013 12:07:20 am

Thanks Steve for your refreshing and thoughtful points of view.

It is unreasonable to think you can satisfy another person's needs completely. If you give it your best shot then there is no need to feel guilty. Have you ever felt completely satisfied from anyone is a good test. Where is the model for this?

Regards,

Tom

steven

10/18/2013 12:26:01 am

I think there are moments when one has experienced full support and love and almost a restlessness takes over. You are free to wander after you felt fully sated.

But yes, of course you speak to how to live and live smartly and wisely. One has to live smart, learn to say no, etc etc. Lesson learned and not to be taken for granted. Survival dictates this.

But i'll expand. I remember as a young child feeling bad about all suffering. I somehow wanted to alleviate all the suffering of the world. Martyr complex, maybe. But just maybe there is something universal here. We are just as strong as our weakest link. Even if suffering produces the pearl, it is still suffering and painful. We know it hurts when we suffer so it is natural to want to help others. I recall reading about Leonardo, who removed an insect alive from his path. This from a man who used to design war machines. Another man I respected questioned killing a fly. I understand this. In time life is opposed to nothingness and to kill any expression of life leaves nothing. Perhaps there is a universal bank account of suffering, and we don't want to add to it.
Perhaps seeing suffering reminds us of the error of existence, the flaw in it all, the hardship of life. So we want to ease it.
Part of us does want to make all well. In not being able to do so we are reminded of our limits. Practical yes, but limited.
Okay, I've gone on. Just some thoughts.
s

Just living causes a deficit

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Steven B. Nussdorf records his lifelong search to find meaning outside of the normal channels. He uses writing, poetry, and drawing to document this effort.

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