Having it hard
Some of you had it hard when young and at times during adulthood. I'm not talking about being brought up working in the coal mines. You might have had middle class surroundings but supports weren't there. Pressures, being drained, no real back up, having to please to live, neglect, all might have played a part in your upbringing.
For a time in adulthood you became super strong or super disciplined to make up for it. Or you even sacrificed to help someone or to serve a vision or a belief. Maybe you got scared and did the safe thing, conformed and forced yourself to get this degree or government job. Or maybe you did pursue that dream, recklessly going against common sense and your well being. You thought if you struggled enough after a while there would be smooth sailing.
What I tend to see in the aftermath with aging peers is that if you did have it hard something has been extracted that you don't get back. It's not as if there is a judge saying this was hard and I'll make it easier. That would have made sense. Rather there has been a toll extracted from your physical and mental being and the wear and tear of this often reflects in physical difficulties and breakdowns. Life was not a game to be played and then put away. There really was damage done if you had it hard in some ways at the beginning. Physically alone there is a cost.
One does pay for that later in life.
Some, who do have the supports in place, build and go through life in a somewhat orderly manner. They of course age but because they carry less trauma their center is in tact. They even could handle more difficulties at times because they had a base they could build upon. Are they conscious? Not necessarily. Are they aware? Not necessarily. But they do not seem to absorb the hits those of you who have had it hard have trouble with. They are not on the line as much. Even so, if you've had it hard and continue to do so, you are forced to dig deep and deeper to find compassion and self acceptance for yourself. In a seemingly backhanded way you arrive at the light deep within you.