446.
Principles
Purity
Compromise
Recently I saw a video of a young long haired man sounding very hippie describe what he did when he killed a man who had just ran someone over and then tried to rape a woman. The predator was 6 ft and over 300 pounds and the young man took an ax and just hit him over the head. That was that and the young man was considered a hero.
In the interview he seemed so sincere and self effacing and all he asked for in return was access to a certain type of surfing board. Like a biblical David, he slayed the giant who was up to no good. His thinking seemed so clear and simple. When listening one could not help but feel so polluted and overly complicated.
I recall hearing my father comment on his grandchild and how pure his reactions were. He said as we get older we are forced to compromise and our motivations are not pure. There 's always self interest. The latter sentence I added.
To stay in this world it is hard to be consistent and true. I thought of my sister who survives by thousands of little compromises. She is at one extreme. Some surety and black and white action and belief is needed. However, on another level everything is compromise. It's the price of living, of handling a changing world.
As it turns out, this young man was accused later of murdering a 70 year old lawyer. So such heroic purity might have been an illusion, or maybe it was true when he saved the girl but he carried his omnipotence too far. And maybe that too far needed to be compromised so he could survive. It wasn't and now his life is messed up.
I think what will happen to us all is that we'll be put in a healing gel after this life. It will be like suspended animation. We will almost float in it, and all our rough edges and jagged wounds and warped thoughts will be suspended in this warm gel and slowly dissipate in some mysterious way.