17.
Early morning hours
In the early morning hours I decided to let in the voice of the above. I think it was a decison to do so, not something that happened to me. What did I have to lose? What I seem to recall is the following; "Steve, I'll fill you up with joy. All your doubts and worries will be flooded by this current of joy. The flow of joy will encompass them. They won't occur because they'll be overrun by this goodness."
I also recall angel like swirls of light bouncing in and around and through me.
I thought after, "did I do this to myself? Was this just wishful thinking? Could I be hurting myself with such illusions?"
But what happened happened. It is part of my landscape now, part of me, and I'll go with it, even if disappointed later.
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