Principles
Friends and acquaintances
Remembering Eddy with a little envy
I just met Eddy a few times and heard about him from time to time. Recently right after my mom's funeral, my sister read his obituary in the New York Times. He died when he was 70 years old. Eddy was the son of a friend of my parents. He wasn't that likeable, not that bright, but had stud looks, played football and played women like an instrument. After college his father treated him to a year abroad. His father joked he “scr_ _ed his way across the world.” Somehow Eddy's passing stuck with me. He was one of those pieces of existence that I wasn't crazy about, but didn't expect to vanish.
One time at a pool in his neighborhood he posed at the edge of the pool and asked me how he looked, if he was too short (5'10”) and if I saw any women looking. Mind you I didn't know him that well. I think he colored his hair. He was vain, egotistical, and self-absorbed. Things just flowed for Eddy. His first marriage was to a black beauty from Jamaica, the daughter of a diplomat and a model. Eddy soon headed an advertising agency there, and had it all. Later he moved to New York with his wife and I remember hearing they had trouble fitting into various groups. Still later I heard he remarried someone who was well off and in his obituary it stated he died in Jamaica, wrote a bestselling children's book, and was a free principled spirit who liked to dance.
Last night had a first man to man talk with my father since after my mom's funeral. We talked about Eddy. We both marveled about how easily things came to him. Part of it was being raised in Roslyn, Long Island, New York, a relaxed suburb with available opportunities and much leeway. My father, who had a chance to move out there didn't. Gail's (my sister) and my life would have been different, not as tough. My dad agreed if Eddy was raised in New York he wouldn't be Eddy. He would not have made a good high school and the other schools were rock tough. It was not easy to survive in those schools. Eddy would have been different here, not able to gallivant around. I even admired that he knew his limitations. Ed transferred to Ohio State where he said he would have been a backup runner behind someone 6'2” who was just as fast. He had no ax to grind so he quit football. It might also mess up his hair. Nothing to prove. Other smaller guys spent their life pushing themselves. Not Eddy, he realized his limitations and moved on. I was 5'8”, forever proving myself, compensating and maneuvering. Not Eddy.
He even died at 70, avoiding the hassles of old age. Bye Eddy.