A nice softness in his voice
Had a nice talk with my dad. I mentioned mom always said time was passing quickly. I said I felt it. It is relentless. I kidded and said’ even my allergies take a day off.’ He said this feeling is delicate and should be valued. There are internal feelings to be worked out. They are private and individual. He said he thought life had three phases, and at 63 I'm beginning the third phase. He said my work reflects the inner workings we're talking about. They are not negative, but rich with experience. He felt mom was present when we talk about such things. Her wisdom is there. These inner workings should not be denied.
Later in the conversation he mentioned he wanted to visit his mom's grave to say Kaddish. Said he at 93 he is a testimony to what she did. A lot of home remedies and time and effort were put into him. His basic needs were always met despite her very hard life. So giving her credit is good and deserving. He spoke of people who said he didn't look 93. His answer was “well, it's was my mom's chicken soup.”
Ah yes, all the private moments. I mentioned to him sometimes they are painful, they are unknown. He said no need to run from them.
I also mentioned if I was younger my art and writing would be about external experience. Now the concern is with the internal. There was a nice softness in his voice.
I said so many tie-ins, resolutions, we don't get to complete. We just get a slice of what can be done. He said this indicates depth in my thinking. He said that's okay, enough is completed and covered to make a difference (my words).